Random Quizzilla

1. When was the last time you fell down in public?
I fell down the escalator at the Post Office Square Garage on Monday. Not all the way down -- I just slipped on the last few steps and my laptop bag and one of my shoes arrived several steps behind me. Luckily the only witness to this spectacle was the Indian parking cashier. What hurt even more was paying $36 to park for two and a half hours.

2. What does your car say about you?
If my car could talk, it'd probably talk shit about me all the time in the Stop & Shop parking lot. A Volvo should be driven by a stable, sensible earth mother with calm children and a well-behaved rescue dog. Instead its occupants include a crazy mama who plays music too loudly and is either singing with or screaming at her kids; toddlers who think it’s hilarious to pee in their car seats; and a pug with an anxiety disorder who fogs up the windows. My car has also become a moving receptacle for empty diet coke cans, homeless cds, bank receipts and take-out bags from Dunkin’ Donuts -- among other things. My daughter is notorious for removing random household items from the house and throwing them into the backseat of my car. This week's items: An oven mitt and a stapler.

3. Which celebrity will be forced into rehab next? My bets are on either Paula Abdul or Britney Spears. It'd be refreshing to see a celeb enter rehab for good old-fashioned drug or alcohol abuse again. I still don't understand what rehab has to do with being a bigot racist , a whore, or a homophobe. There is not, to my knowledge, a 12-step program for Assholism.

4. When was the last time you cooked something different or tried a new kind of food?
I do this every day of the week. I find a new recipe on the Internets and then head to Assinippi for the ingredients. Then, I banish my family from the kitchen so I can make dinner and have a glass of wine while watching Hardball and listening to a kitchen-dancing playlist. It's becoming ritualistic. I don't repeat recipes too much but every so often one comes along that makes it into the permanent repetoire A few weeks ago, I made some Spanish garbanzo beans after finding a recipe online that was similar to the ones we love at Toro. YUM. They're here to stay.

5. What are you focused on right now?
As my old colleague BB Smooth J. used to say every day at 10 a.m: "I'm focused on lunch."