A steamy Tuesday with skyrocketing pollen counts...the perfect day to debut Caroline’s Elmo Sprinkler. I strategically placed Elmo on the lawn where he could water some of my crispy, neglected flowers while we frolicked in the mist. Caroline crouched to chat with Elmo -- “How you doin’, Elmo? How’s work?’ -- while I set up the hose. Paulie plopped himself down in the grass a few yards away, his belly hanging out over his Hawaiian swim trunks. He noshed on Pirate’s Booty and ripped up tiny fistfuls of grass. Vito, the pug speed bump, hindered progress by going Rikki Tikki Tavi on the hose as I tried to unfurl it. I finally got it hooked up to the sprinkler and we were ready to roll. I went to turn on the water and warned Caroline to stand back. She backed up slowly, hands on her hips, intensely focused on the fun that was about to come. Suddenly, Elmo shot water from his feet with such force it was like someone had opened a hydrant. The blast knocked wee Caroline flat on her swimmy diaper. Tears rivaling the sprinkler’s spray ensued. “All done,” Caroline bawled, running toward me soaked and devastated. Paulie started laughing his head off and tipped over. Then he started bawling too. Ever the opportunist, Vito started hauling ass up the driveway toward the neighbors’ house. I had to carry both babies inside simultaneously – which is no easy task. Once inside, I coaxed them off the ledge with purple popsicles and a Tivoed episode of Hi-Five. Elmo soaked the flowers for about four hours. We'll try this again tomorrow.
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