03 February 2006

Cream Shop Friday: Britney & Jesus


The Stechford Baptist Church in Birmingham, England recently kicked off a series of little plays called “What would Jesus say too…..,” in which Jesus speaks to famous people through a radio. And this week Jesus spoke to Britney. Director Martin Turner said the event was less about Britney herself and more a cautionary tale for those who believe fame begets happiness.

"There's nothing wrong with fame--Jesus certainly is the most famous Christian--but that's not where happiness lies," Turner said.

So, what did Jesus ultimately say to Spears?

"What we concluded was that Jesus would say there's more to life than fame, that it's fleeting," Turner said.

In fact, Turner said, he thinks Jesus "would have loved Britney's music."

"I'm not sure he would have loved all over her videos," Turner said, "but I don't think Jesus was ever freaked out by overt sex."

Other notables to get a talking to, in a theoretical sense, in the coming weeks include Princes William and Harry, Bart Simpson, sci-fi icon Dr. Who and theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking. (Condensed from E!Online)

A QUESTION TO PONDER IN THE CREAM SHOP: What do you think Jesus should have said to Britney? Even better, what would Jesus say to that asshead K-Fed.

BONUS VIDEO: CLICK HERE FOR SOME FRIDAY AFTERNOON HUMOR

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ah, KJ. This is the question I've been waiting for. Everyone knows my loathing of Le Brit is palpable. I actually have a physical and painful reaction every time I hear or see her, much like Kramer upon hearing Mary Hart's voice. Just ask DoubleDown or WMD.

I think JC would have said the following to Britney:

"Britney, you should not have marketed yourself as a teen pop vocalist when, in reality ,you are a glorified poster child for internet kiddie porn who cannot sing. You should not have been allowed to perform at the Super Bowl or had the opportunity to ever be in the presence of Bono. Ever. Those types of advantageous circumstance should be reserved for people who actually appreciate music as an art form or at least have talent beyond a common stripper. You should have known that Federline was a dirt bag, since it was pretty obvious to basically every other human on earth. Also, LP thinks you are a skank. Now, please stop wearing crucifixes and tongue-kissing Madonna. I need to give that beeyotch another talking to..."

Anonymous said...

I can attest that LP has an unnatural and unparalleled disdain for a simple yet sweet mouseketeer. I have never seen anything like it. It's even surpassed my desire to punch Rosie O'Donnell in the face. I fear this hatred is going to turn into a single white female syndrome where LP will start dancing around with a head-mic, snake and a bra.... which would be cool

p.s. Bags, please post the Family Guy K-Fed clip link here.

KJ said...

For some reason, I couldn't post the K-Fed clip and the link to it is no longer valid. BOOOO. However, Bags, came across this delightful nugget that is worth spending time in the cream shop.
www.divorcekevin.com.

WMD-did you get the Baldwin chest hair photo I sent you the other day?

KJ said...

When you visit the divorce kevin Web site, MAKE SURE you watch the video of K-Trash jammin' to his own song. "A Brazilian ass shaker." Priceless.

Anonymous said...

1) that family guy clip is worth a google search. If you don't like K-Fed you will laugh whatever you have off.

2) did not get the picture KJ. Glad too, that may have freaked me out. That canteen boy skit used to be great. now it would make me uncomfortable.

KJ said...

Just posted the video of K-Fed above. Enjoy!

Anonymous said...

K-Fed The Impregnator and Le Brit were clearly made for each other. PopoZao must be Portuguese for "what a tool."

Anonymous said...

I think LP summed it up beautifully for all us gals. Grow up Brit. Take off the mouse ears and the chain-mail thong and start acting like a grown-up.

That poor child is in serious trouble. You know it's not good when Madonna's children would be a positive influence on your own. Pretty sad Brit, pretty sad.

Anonymous said...

What a f'n tool. And was it really necessary to have 2 cameras in there filming this donkey rap to his own CRAP? Ha! RAP TO CRAP! Sorry... that's 2 Bug Lights talking. Anyways, slight resemblance to Vanilla Ice.