08 June 2007

Toss her in a Landfill

(Recycle me)

Paris Hilton wears her stupidity and uselessness like a tacky tiara. So you know she is absolutely thrilled to show the world that she’s too weak in spirit to serve her sentence like a big girl. She loves sending the message that the laws don’t apply to her and her ilk. Just as she gets a rush from cutting the lines at LA’s nightclub of the week – she gets off on everyone knowing that she has privileges that regular people don’t. “You will never get into my club. Suck it, peons.” When you’re Paris Hilton, you don’t persevere or be penitent, you do some jumping jacks and get taken out for a Slushpuppy. When you’re Paris Hilton, you don’t suck it up in private shame, you get dumb toadies like MTV VJ Suchin Pak calling you “courageous” for showing up on the red carpet at the MTV Movie Awards.

Luckily, this whore has an expiration date. Karmic retribution will come with middle age when she’s marveling at her own boring irrelevance. Something tells me that ferret face is not going to age well.

Anyway, the big question today: Will she or won’t she go back to the slammer? There is all this talk about “overcrowding” but she’s a waste of space whether she’s in jail or not. My solution: Her soul may be plastic but she’s biodegradable. Screw jail. Toss her in a landfill somewhere. Stuff her ass in a recycle bin and turn her into a sustainable energy source. Maybe she and her natty hair extensions can finally make themselves useful

7 comments:

Pam said...

I don't know why I care, but it infuriated me that she got sprung from jail - and I am praying she gets thrown back it today. It would actually be pretty funny - she got to spend 2 nights in luxury and then gets sent back to detention center. I get the feeling her mysterious medical condition is non-stop crying and screaming "WHY ME" and the guards just can't take it anymore.

I really do hope that her karmic retribution will come, but I think she is too stupid to realize how boring and useless she really is.

In her twisted head, she truly is a celebrity (I still wonder how that happened)and needs to be treated as such. As a mother of two young girls, I am so done with the Lindsay Lohans, Britney Spears and Paris Hiltons of the world. I wish they would all GO AWAY!!!

sb said...

I agree with you KJ in that Paris' smooth-skinned mug will one day resemble that of Leather Face (the infamous money grubbing, controlling, pushy parking attendant in Hyannisport). But she'll splurge on endless plastic surgery and end up looking like the Cat Lady.

Check out this freak -
http://www.banterist.com/archivefiles/images/plastic_surgery_amok.jpg

KJ said...

PAM-With you all the way, sister. We need to round up those bitches and put them all in a landfill.

KJ said...

BG-Upsetting! That would be justice for Hilton, tho.

I hope Leather Face is on Ocean Street with his red flag in July. How many more weeks til Nantucket? I can't wait.

Cols said...

Paris Hilton's dillusional behavior reached its peak when she tried to trademark the phrase, "that's hot!"

PLEASE tell me someone saw the Roy Black-Laura Ingraham exchange on Paris this morning on the Today Show? Roy Black is such a skeezy criminal defense attorney--he said Laura (who thought Paris should have to serve her time like everyone else) was just "jealous of Paris." Matt Lauer almost fell out of his chair when Roy said that. Ridiculous.

Kate--your boy Dan Abrams was on the Today show talking about this too...I think he dyed his hair because he is no longer gray!

KJ said...

COLS! Yes..I saw that and had the same reaction as Matt Lauer. I despise Laura but was so in her corner this morning. Roy Black is a slippery whore.

SAW DAN TOO. He was on MSNBC last night as well. I noticed he's given himself some Just for Men hair gel treatment. Thank goodness...that gray made him look 20 years older.

sb said...

ACK is 6 weeks from today, KJ.