1. Paris Hilton is Still Really Stupid:
Sometimes it's humorous when people accidentally call something or someone the wrong name. My personal favorites are when James mistakenly referred to Casa Romero as "Cafe Rodriguez" and the Circe's Grotto sandwich shop in Scituate as "The Groratoria." However, nobody is paying him buckets of cash to represent these establishments. Paris Hilton, as usual, is a whole nutha story. She made a brief appearance at the Electronic Entertainment Expo to promote her new video game "Paris Hilton's Jewel Jam" but repeatedly referred to the game as "Diamondquest." WTF. Doesn't even sound like Jewel Jam. I can't figure out if she's mildly retarded or a publicity genius: Her slip-up has made every online, print and television news site today and sent me right into the Cream Shop wondering what was she thinking -- but then I realized she doesn't.
2. Auntie is Really Pregnant:
Celine marked the halfway point of her pregnancy by installing a step next to her bed as she's having trouble heave-ho-ing the fetus and herself in and out of it. "I may soon have to start rocking her to get momentum in getting up there," said Bags.
3. Paulie is Really Stuck in the Dora the Explorer Tent:
This behemoth of a tent has overtaken our living room alongside the Dora patio set. It's a small world within a world here where we've all been living like shut-ins because of the crap weather. Unfortunately, Paulie's so burly that every time he enthusiastically bumrushes the tent, he gets tripped up in the folds and overturns it. This makes Caroline absolutely livid. I've had to dislodge him from the folds at least five times today.
4. Caroline Really Loves Hide-N-Seek:
And because she loves it, she insists everyone else love it too. She's the hide-n-seek enforcer, the hide-n-seek Nazi. "Will you go hide, Mama. I'm serious. GO HIDE. NOW!" I'm running out of places to hide but it doesn't really matter because she peeks. Ready or not, here she comes.
Mama needs to get out-the-house. Who's up for South Shore cocktails tonight?