02 November 2005


(photo: Elaborate displays like this are not uncommon in the suburbs)

It was Caroline's first Halloween adventure and she, as Dora, was ready. Joined by Isabella, Maria, Demetra and Peg, Caroline warmed up for some serious trick-or-treatage. She rehearsed lines from her favorite Dora episode "Berry Hunt" and danced around the kitchen island to the Dora theme song, pretending to be chased by Swiper the Fox. Paulie had no interest in partaking this year.

(photo: If you try to put that monkey suit on me, I'll scream, I mean it, I'll scream)

In the burbs, Halloween is taken very, very seriously. Homes are decked. Some, tastefully, with elaborately carved jack-o-lanterns glowing along the walksways. Others not-so-tastefully with motion-sensored electric witches whose eyes light up and shriek when someone walks by.

(photo: Gimme a KitKat)

The pumpkins that I had oh-so-artfully placed on my front stairs were half-eaten by some forest-dwelling creature last week. I purchased an artificial jack-o-lantern at Stop & Shop and placed it in the window, but its ultra-low-wattage bulb barely glowed and filled our house with the aroma of an electrical fire.

All did not matter as we were on a mission. Caroline and Isabella (Sleeping Beauty) became intoxicated by the sound of candy falling into their treat buckets and vowed to hit every well-lit home on the street...and they did. I was also on a mission of my own, having been asked by James to identify the "elderly" people who may be moving out of the neighborhood soon.

(photo: I think they ran out of candy, Bella. Let's get some TP and deeestroy this place!)

James was happy to learn that several people in the neighborhood fit this profile. Not only have a few of our neighbors surpassed the adult-active community stage, but several look like they may drop dead at any moment. Homes in the neighborhood could be up for sale very soon, perhaps for some South Shore bound pals.


James said...

It should be noted that Vito scared the shit out of the first few trick or treaters before I locked him in the basement. Also with Paulie in my hands I was unable to hand out Candy so I told the kids to take two from the bucket at my feet. I quickly learned that take two meant take as many as you can fit in your pudgy little hands.

wmd said...

Nice work James. If you can find a murder-house, I've heard they're like half the price...

KJ said...

My worst fear is someone will drop dead in their home and scare off potential pal-buyers. We're keeping 911 on speed dial, WMD.

SB said...

Any chance you can befriend these elderly neighbors and feed them a fine concoction of Echinacea and Orange Juice to extend their stay another year? Slowly deplete the echinacea portion of this stew to all OJ by August, then come Dec '06, make it 33% OJ/33% Jeagmermeister/33% arsenice. The house will be on the market Jan '07. Either that or they'll morph into G.O.G.

james said...

Nice GOG reference Brownguy. WMD we had murder houses a plenty in Eastie. Damn Suburbia nobody getting killed and everything.

jal said...

But James they needed your candy as they were likely getting apples with razor blades from the elderlies down the street.