17 August 2006

"A Modern Marvel"

Guest blogger SAC waxes philosophical on a ground breaking invention, one that will surely revolutionize the way we imbibe.

Mankind has witnessed many great accomplishments over the past 150 hundred years. Each time something new is developed, society, in general, has benefited from these amazing feats. The accomplishments are far reaching, from transporation marvels like the Chunnel that connects England to France via high speed rail service (and as far as I know does not leak like the one we have in town), to things like the Hoover Dam that provide electricity to thousand of customers, to the Internet, which connects all people to more information and allows us to collaborate on projects from the four corners of the Globe.

Of course the list goes on and many have more impact on our day to day lives but if I elaborated on those subjects, I would not have enough time to tell you about, perhaps, mankinds greatest achivement to date:

The Beer Opening Flip Flop.

Very stylish and highly functional, this is something that I should have thought of! I no longer need to carry a churchkey on my keyring, keep one in the car, stashed in the cooler, borrow somebody's lighter, or use my teeth or anything else for so long as it is in the summer months, I have a beer opener at hand or rather at foot.

This will surely lead to the beer opening work boot, sneaker, dress shoe and snow boot.

I cannot believe it took this long to invent this!



BAGS said...

Other great inventions, somewhere on the list next to the beer opening flip flop:

1)Peapod - Gives you the option of never going into a supermarket again.
2)The Pill / IUD's (this modern technology hasn't made it to Holyoke yet.)
3)600 Pound Gorilla Cookies
4)Fantasy football and baseball
5)Any alternative to the post office (UPS/FedEx/Email etc.)
7)Caller ID
9)Mapquest / Magellan - any GPS system for directionally challenged individuals such as Auntie.

lpd said...

Oh, SNAP! Looks like SAC has single-white-femaled WMD on his Bud-crackin' footwear, given to WMD last year as a gift by his brother in Florida where state law requires ALL accessories (shoes, belt buckles, etc) must be able to open a beverage.

Soon, Goy will be sporting corkscrew heeled stilettos...

Cameo said...

SAC -- I had no idea how poetic you were. This ode to the flip-flop bottle opener brought tears to my eyes. It's just oozing with love and appreciation. Does Goy know how you feel??

PS: Does it work with Heinies????

KJ said...

Just more proof that booze -- not necessity -- is the mother of invention. True that, LPD. While spending time in Key West, we met a man named "STUMP" who carried his gold-plated bottle opener "comb style" in the back pocket of his jean shorts aka swimsuit aka work outfit

GOY AKA ST said...

Unfortunately for me, it does work on Heinies. However, Heinies only make rare appearances and SAC has been forced to find some alternatives. In his pursuit to replace the evil brew, he has latched on to Red Stripe. I still say there is nothing like an ice cold Coors Light!