04 May 2007

Cream Shop Friday: The Hoff on the Sauce

I was planning on making this a Hasselhoff-free Friday but I couldn’t stay away.

I’m sure by now everyone’s seen the drunken video of him lying on the floor, shirtless, struggling with what appears to be a Godzilla burger from Eagle’s Deli. His teenage daughter shot the video – at the Hoff’s request – to show him what an idiot he looks like when he’s drunk off his ass. I’m sure he did not request the video also be leaked to EXTRA or other cheesy gossip outlets to show the world what an idiot he looks like when he’s drunk off his ass, but this is the world we live in now.

Hasselhoff is currently locked in a contentious custody battle with his ex-wife. The Alec Baldwin incident has ushered in this new trend of putting your dirty business on the street to use as leverage. The irony is that the act of leaking the dirty business may be worse than the original offense. I feel badly for the kids. “This is a mess,” Hoff says on the video, summing up his failed burger nosh. It’s only a matter of time before his daughters experience a similar fate. (Even more so because of that photo up there)

That said, I found the video sad but not shocking. He looks like any other drunken boob with the munchies. Who hasn’t had those mornings where you've woken up with shrimp fried rice in your bed, still clutching a chicken wing?

Also, I don’t think the Hoff will sweat this one. He’s made no secret of the fact that he’s a recovering alcoholic with wagon troubles. We’ve all seen his videos; he’s a pretty shameless guy, certainly not someone who is meticulous about image. In the wake of the “scandal,” he released a statement expressing gratitude, not contempt for his children, saying he will seek redemption in the leaked footage.

This morning, I spent some time in the Cream Shop looking at some classic Hasselhoff animations that we've randomly emailed to each other over the years. Next week, the drunken video will be the latest entry into the new Hoff Gallery, a burgeoning Internet database of all things Hasselhoff, but I will always prefer to watch this one.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great post, kj, but I had to cover that photo of the Hoff while reading it.

sb said...

Who the heck would let someone take a video of them while they're drunk and stuffing their face?

I love the Hoff flying away from the picnic. That's great.

mike said...

I'm sure this was a great read but I couldn't get past that photo. That was wrong.

KJ said...

Such outcry over that pervy photo! I've received so many complaints about it and I apologize for any emotional distress it may have caused.

Just be thankful that I didn't post this one:

http://www.965thebuzz.com/morningshow/pictures/david-hasselhoff-img_2.png

LPD said...

sb said...
"Who the heck would let someone take a video of them while they're drunk and stuffing their face?"

LPD answers...
Please refer to "Survival Wootown" footage. Thank you, Gog.

BTW...methinks we are overdue for a double matinee of "The Body Show"/"Survival Wootown"

KJ said...

Who would let someone take a video of them when they're drunk and dancing with a blow-up doll to "Who Let the Dogs Out?"

LPD-I'm happy to host that double-feature.

lpd said...

Let's DO it! Brownguy and the Haleys haven't been to the house yet. I think we're due for a creature double feature... Perhaps over memorial day weekend????

KJ said...

LDT. This is crying out for a Creature Double Feature eVite. We can have T-Bag create some photoshop hybrid of Brownguy & Godzilla.